Teaching a Penguin to Fly

Penguins are interesting birds. Nobody argues that they fit in the "bird" category: They have feathers like birds, they have beaks like birds, they lay eggs like birds. They even have wings, just like we expect from birds. However, they cannot fly like birds, despite having what, on first glance, would appear to be all the requisite equipment. Now, we nature lovers do not expect those penguins to fly. No one would dream of telling a penguin they could fly, if only they tried harder. We know they would need constant support from below to even get off the ground, and they certainly couldn't maintain flight! But that's all right with us, because they have other characteristics we praise: they are graceful swimmers, tireless parents, and demonstrate some hilarious antics. They even overcome some terrifying hardships we would not want to face, such as terrible extreme temperatures, biting blizzards, and months-long treks without food. They even still are nice to their young, even on an empty stomach. Could we say the same?

My daughter is a penguin. All the signs point to her being a normal little girl, who should be able to handle what all the other little girls do. Responsibility, being left alone, completing homework, writing reports. And yet these, for her, are like asking a penguin to fly. She has so many other gifts: she is great at math, an ace speller, and a naturally talented gymnast. Best of all, she has a way of finding the best in people from which most of us could learn a thing or two.

By sixth grade, teachers expect students to be handling all of their homework on their own. Her teachers will acknowledge that she is a penguin, will smile and nod understandingly when I discuss her limitations, but in practice they still want her to fly like the other birds. For some of her assignments, this works great. Math, spelling, grammar, and much of her geography homework can be done independently. But writing assignments are, for her, akin to flying. Now, I don't think she should be exempt from these assignments. Learning how to organize ideas, and put them to paper is an important skill. If we had made her exempt over the years from the various subjects which troubled her, the math, spelling, etc. would not be happening at all now. We spent hours working on reading, working on math, etc. in order for her to find her own wings in these subjects. It probably took a lot more "man hours" than for most students, but we got there, and I remind her with pride of how far she has come from those days. We have, however, asked that her work in these tough areas be judged not in relation to the "average" sixth grader, but on their own merit, as examples of the best she can accomplish.

So I recently came to a point of peace and compromise regarding the help I provide with writing assignments. As I see it, I have two choices: I can either let her flail and fail, or give her the support from below that she needs to at least experience the feeling of flying, and maybe pick up a few of the skills along the way. Recently, she had to write a poem with rhythm and rhyme. HA! I asked her to come up with an idea, helped her tweak it, and helped her find a rhyming phrase that fit the poem's theme. On her own, she would never have known what the teacher wanted. Hopefully, next time an assignment like this comes up, she will have a slightly better understanding of the goal, and more of it will come from her.

This week, it's a report on seals. She did great on taking notes for the paper (this is very concrete - you read the book, you write interesting things on cards, and add the page number). Writing the outline was a bit more difficult. When she tried to start on her own, she started piling her 20+ cards into what she thought were separate topics.... and had about 16 piles. This would make for either a very long report, or one with a lot of short paragraphs. I helped her group them by broader topics, put them in order, and turn them into an outline. I then walked her through the process of typing and formatting it on the computer. She did all the computer work, but I spent a lot of time directing her, "click that button.... up to the left... farther left... a little down... no, now a little up... click it once... OK, hit undo, then click it once this time..."...and so on.... Whew! On to the next step.

Writing the rough draft has been interesting (and not a little draining). I decided to have her start with the central paragraphs, then move to the intro and conclusion. She keeps wanting to put random interesting facts in the intro, so I figured it was best to start with the section where she could get those details out of her system, then go to the more general paragraphs. Sometimes it's like pulling teeth. I have to lead her into the first words of each sentence and idea. She'll tell me what she wants to say one second, and then completely forget the information a second later. Or sometimes her words her in sentences order in come out may not. I don't want to just hand the sentences to her - I think it sets a bad precedent - but sometimes it seems she just gets stuck, so I do more leading. Other times, the ideas flow easily. So I sat her at the computer, sat nearby, and provided prompts so she could get her rough draft written. Tomorrow I will have her sit down with her printout and edit for spelling, grammar, and any facts she wanted to include but forgot. By Friday, we will have a paper completed. It may not be at the standard for her grade level, but she will have written as much as she is able. More importantly, she will have the experience (with support) of flying just like the others in her class.

Others may have different opinions, but I think this is more help to her than letting her put down random information without understanding it, and more supportive than embarrassing her by sending her to school empty-handed. She is so proud when she brings home an assignment with a good grade, after working so hard on it. (Plus, if she figures out she can get out of one assignment, it won't stop there, and we'll be heading down a slippery slope.) She rides a fine line - she tests of average intelligence and some things come easily to her, but others subjects are terribly difficult. I sometimes think it might be simpler if she was more firmly in the "can't" category. Less would be expected of her, and I would feel more willing to surrender to the inevitable. But right now, she is holding in there, and I want that for her as long as possible.

This may not be the "teacher approved" method, but it seems to work. Each time, she gets a little more independent. Her sentences get a little better vocabulary, a little more interesting structure. And I know that her future career will likely not involve poetry, or writing reports, or even giving long answers about an author's purpose in a story. She will use her other given talents, and shine just as brightly, even if she never flies.

And with each new assignment, she will know a little more what it is like to fly.