Life With the Literal Child

The other day in the car, DD was telling me about a conversation she'd had on the bus the previous day. Her class had earned a party because of good behavior, and she, DS, and three friends from her class (triplets, actually), had been chatting about the party on the trip home. DD told me, "We were all talking about the party, and "Cindy" said we shouldn't go to it."

Well, that seemed odd, to not wish to attend a class party, particularly after it had already occurred. DS added that they had been talking about something gross someone had said at the party, and Cindy had said not to go.

I asked, "Did she say something like, 'You don't want to go there'?"

The kids hemmed and hawed, and I said, "Maybe not those exact words, but something along those lines?" Yes, DD said, it did sound kind of like her friend's words.

So I got to explain that the phrase, "You don't want to go there," had nothing to do with a warning from Cindy not to attend the party, and everything to do with a topic she recommended avoiding.

Fortunately, once I define a phrase like this for DD as an idiom, she knows to classify that in the "don't take word-for-word" category, but until I catch all of them, it's no wonder her world is a little confused!

While I Was Out

DH and I just returned from our anniversary cruise. It has been 10 wonderful years since I was blessed to marry this wonderful man, and I wouldn't give him up for the world. I don't think I write here enough about what a great man I've had the good fortune to marry, but this will demonstrate, once again, why I love him so much!

We got home from our trip late on a Sunday night. We had made arrangements for the kids to stay where they were for that night, knowing it would be a late night for us, and not knowing if we might end up with airport delays on the homebound flight. We walked in and started putzing a little bit - checking the mail, checking e-mail, feeding cats, a little unpacking, that sort of thing. After a while, DH started encouraging me to head up to bed, saying he would close up.

Well, I found a few more things to putz with, and again he pushed me towards bed. Finally, I headed upstairs, and this is what I found:


Of course, none of you (well, maybe Kari) has seen my bedroom as it was previously decorated. It was OK, but nothing thrilling. I am not one of those who has a decorator's touch, and I had never gotten around to selecting curtains. We had planned for years to repaint the bedroom, but that project was constantly relegated to the "later" stack.

This was DH's anniversary gift to me. He made arrangements with a decorator and painter to redo our bedroom for me while we were on vacation. They did an amazing job! I love the color of the walls, and I never would have thought to put the gold with the green, but it makes it feel so rich and warm to me. Most of the items are ours, rearranged and improved, with a few new accent items, like the lamps, bedspread and curtains.

They also made a lovely arrangement of pictures in the corner - the large oval is a c. 1918 photograph of my grandmother and her sisters as children, while the other three b&w shots are of my grandparents, DH's grandmother, and my great aunt. It made me cry.

The best part of it all was what you see on the breakfast tray. DH wrote me the most beautiful letter I have ever read. He put his heart into it, and I have never read anything so wonderfully written. He told me that this "While You Were Out" makeover was something he had been thinking of for years, taking notes on what I liked, planning for a sanctuary for me. Every time I read this letter, I still cry. I am trying to convince him to let me post it here, because I think it needs to be shared, and I am so proud of what he wrote.

You can't tell very clearly here, but there is a faux finish on the bathroom walls, new window treatments and a new shower curtain. The brighter color really makes this room feel huge!

DH was so nervous on the way home from the airport, and now I knew why. He had admitted to being jittery, but attributed it to being wired from the long day of travel. In actuality, he realized that once I saw the room, he would either win husband of the year, or be spending the next month in the doghouse (and we don't even have a dog!) He needn't have worried - I love the final result!

DH gives me more credit than I deserve, and downplays his importance in my life. I could not travel this road without him by my side, sharing the burden and helping me laugh when things seem darkest. Not many men would have stood by through everything that happened after my mom's death (not to mention, shoveled cat poop out of the hallway). Not many men would have chosen this adoption and fostering path with me. Not many men would have succeeded the way he has - he is one of the FASD success stories, and I am so proud to have him as my husband. I love you honey!

Back in the Saddle Again

Well, we are back from our wonderful vacation in the Caribbean, and have been for two weeks (although I don't think we can officially be back from vacation when we still have one suitcase to be emptied (just a little bit)) DH reminds me every day that I haven't blogged yet, and that my public is waiting (HA! I don't think I have a public, just some wonderful friends out there who help keep me sane (or at least try.... after all, that's a losing battle!) by reminding me that I am not alone) I think he's just eager to see what I put in the next post (you'll see why in a minute).

I know I have been a very poor poster since my return, mostly because it has seemed to be one late night after another the past couple of weeks. By the time I've reached the end of each day, I just haven't had the energy.

I also owe a very belated, but very heartfelt thank you to Linda, for the two awards she presented me while I was being flakey! These are my very first awards, and I am touched that she thought of me. I love to read her blog - I always have admired her strength in dealing with some pretty tough situations that would have broken lesser women. Plus, I have been blessed to meet her in person, and found someone I really enjoyed getting to know.

So here are the awards I received from her:


The Premio Dardos Award:


The Dardos Award is given in "recognition of cultural, ethical, literary, and personal values transmitted in the form of creative and original writing. These stamps were created with the intention of promoting fraternization between bloggers, a way of showing affection and gratitude for work that adds value to the Web.The rules:

1) Accept the award by posting it on your blog along with the name of the person that has granted the award and a link to his/her blog.

2) Pass the award to another five blogs that are worthy of this acknowledgment, remembering to contact each of them to let them know they have been selected for this award.

The Lemonade Award:

Here are the rules...1. Copy the above logo and put it on your blog or post.2. Nominate at least 10 blogs that show attitude and/or gratitude (Those who add sweetness to life and/or inspire you by making lemonade.)3. Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.4. Let them know they have received this award by commenting on a post.5. Nominate your favorites and link to this blog.

I'm rather new at this, and Linda nominated a lot of the folks whom I would have nominated, too, so I am just going to give some links to my favorite blogs (in addition to Linda's):

Kari's Thought's Preserved - My first intro to the blog world, and an inspiring friend

Bart's A Whole New World - I love his quiet, thoughful entries. He doesn't post often, but what he posts is beautiful.

Mom in MN's My thoughts... like 'em or not - I ike 'em, especially the one about the shoe tradition.


Torina's Busy Intersection - She has some challenging kiddos, and full plate with work and school, and she still finds time to make beautiful embroidery and quilts (while it took me 3 years to crochet one blanket). She rocks!

These are for those who like their lemonade a little on the tart side:


Foster Mama's Postcards from Insanity - She always makes me laugh with her snarky comments insightful discourse on life as a spouse and parent.


Reas Kroicowl's Trench Warfare - This pseudonym'd social worker gives me a glimpse and a giggle about life on the other side of our stories. I know that some of the things she deals with each day must be draining and emotional, yet she can still see the humor in it all.

This is by no means all of them, but I am brain blocked, and it's getting late. I'll add more if/when I think of whom I've forgotten.

Just Because I Can...

Hi there. I am writing a post today from St. Maarten/St. Martin. Just because I can...

I am taking advantage of the free internet access at a local jewelry store. Our cruise line gave us a certificate for the VIP lounge here because today is our anniversary. So I decided to use it. Not for the free drinks (although I may have to take advantage of that one, too). Not for the free coffee (sorry, Kari), and not for the access to the special, exclusive collection of diamond jewelry (yea, like that is in my price range!). No, I'm here for the blog access. The addictive drug of the new millennium!

It's actually a bit chilly here today - only in the mid-70's to low-80's, and sprinkling once in a while. It's pretty rough. This is a beautiful island, though, and we took a trip over to the french side this morning. If you get a chance, look up the island on Wikipedia - it's actually pretty interesting.

By the way - it's been interesting logging in internationally - Blogger put the Dashboard buttons in Spanish when we were in Puerto Rico, and in Dutch here. It's fun trying to figure out which one to click!

Well, back to the sun, and souvenier shopping. Only 2 more days and we will be on our way home :( All good things must come to an end. Unless I miss the ship.....hmm....

Tropics, Here We Come!

I just thought I would take this opportunity to make a last post before we take off. We will be without access for the next week, unless we spring for the ship internet connection. In a couple of hours, we will board our cruise ship for the Southern Caribbean. Yay!

The kids are with their first foster parents for the week, and I gave them a 10 page write-up on "what to expect," schedule details, contact information, our itinerary, etc. Most friends think that might be excessive. My SIL, whose daughter has Asperger's, and similar behaviors to DD's, just said, "Yep, done that." I think the foster-mom got a better idea of what she'll be dealing with when she heard that DD was caught stealing someone's lip gloss and forging my signature on an incomplete assignment notice, all in the same day. These behaviors are always present, but seem to ramp up when we're gone. I think it's a good sign of attachment though, that DD says she is nervous about our leaving - in the past, it never seemed to phase her.

I also wrote a brief letter for the kids for each day of our vacation, showing where we are and what we will be doing, with pictures, since any post cards we send won't get there for a while. I created a journal for each of them, with a letter from DH and I, and multiple pictures of our family, the adoption, special things, the pets. I left them with my teddy bear, and the crocheted blanked I just finished (after 3 years), so they could take turns with something from home. OK, maybe I over-prepared, but I would rather they have more connections to us than less.

We arrived in San Juan, PR yesterday morning at 6AM, after an all night flight. As you can imagine, we were pretty exhausted, and thought we would drop our luggage off at the hotel until they allowed us to check in. Imagine our surprise (and relief!) when they told us our room was ready right away. Some breakfast, a nap, and a shower does wonders for the spirit.

We did a little exploring yesterday in Old San Juan - an authentic Puerto Rican lunch with fried cassava sticks and mashed plantians w/ garlic chicken. Yay for DH for being an adventurous diner - he said I've rubbed off on him over the years. It was very good, though different from the tastes we are used to. I can see why plantains are a staple of the Caribbean diet - they are very filling, and I've heard they are very nutritious, too.

I am listening to DH giggle maniacally, as he is on the next computer checking the local newspaper website. Apparently it's 1F degree back home - 1 whole degree. (I sometimes think they put 1F instead of 0F only so that people don't get entirely discouraged.) Now he is cackling at the -14F winchill, and rubbing his hands. What a cruel husband I have....

I would never be so mean as to laugh at your misfortune, or to mention that the low here yesterday was in the mid-70's, and that it was so hot yesteday in the mid-80's that we were sweating. I am just too noble.